Renaming the Texas State Bobcats

As a forewarning I just want to say I have no desire to see Texas State change their nickname. It’s a great mascot that perfectly represents the school but since the college football landscape is kind of slow right now - save for the spree of Texas State commits - I’d say we can fit a alternative-history article all up in you.

Plus if bobcats evolve rapidly for some reason and their brain capacity allows for social and cultural sensitivity and they feel offended we are nicknamed “Bobcats,” these alternative names can help.

With that being said, let’s get started.

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1: Heartbreakers

One of the most famous people to ever go to school in San Marcos was former WWE champion Shawn Michaels. Even though he didn’t last a whole school year, the “heartbreak kid” was still a Bobcat so it still counts. At halftime when the Strutters perform they could incorporate some Sweet Chin Music kicks into their routine.

2: Armadillos

The 1991 movie Necessary Roughness is the inspiration for this name. The film follows the fictional Texas State Armadillos football team after their program is hit with the “death penalty” similar to what happened to SMU. Coincidentally in the movie, the Armadillos play the Southwest Texas State Bobcats in their season opener. 12 Years later the Bobcats dropped “Southwest” from their name becoming simply Texas State.

3: Salamanders

San Marcos is home to a type of salamander that lives exclusively around the San Marcos river that can’t be seen anywhere else in the world. Instead of the good ol’ claw and Texas hand gestures we throw up to represent our school, we could stick out our tongues and wiggle them around.

4: Zombies

Texas State University boasts the largest body farm in the nation out of the six universities that participate. In case you all don’t know a body farm is a facility where donated bodies are allowed to decompose in various outdoor settings as to help study how the human body decomposes to solve crimes or unsolved deaths. It may seem offensive to those people whose bodies are donated but whatever. Zombies are hot right now with shows such as The Walking Dead popular right now.

Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images

5: Tubers

One of the biggest pastimes at Texas State is utilizing the river in the form of tubing. You’ll find tons of people on the weekends floating and drinking the day away. Add a water go ‘round to the stadium and people can tube, drink and watch football instead of opting for the river.

Conclusion

As funny as they may sound, nothing can replace Bobcats but here’s an idea Texas State. Have a game where Shawn Michaels does the coin toss, another where the team wears the Texas State Armadillos uniforms, add a small water park and have a halftime show where the marching band does a tribute to the body farm or zombies.