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The Red Wolves Finally Have The New Orleans Bowl Theme Song You Were Too Afraid to Request

Not since "The Super Bowl Shuffle" has the world been treated to such musical majesty.

Everything you've heard before is now crap.
Everything you've heard before is now crap.
Daniel Boczarski/Getty Images

This sound clip appeared on my Twitter feed like The Undertaker and proceeded to body slam all other Tweets right out of my timeline. One listen, and you'll grow a second pair of fists from your first set of fists. It's like eating a battleship and crapping a Death Star. NASA uses this sound byte to change the trajectory of meteors. Justin Bieber sampled it and instantly grew 700 pounds of wavy chest hair. Kobe Bryant won't take orders from The Emperor, but this song made Kobe its butler. This song makes "Hello" sound like a plastic bag of frogs. It turned down the opportunity to coach Georgia Southern, but is said to be considering Alabama. Just shut up and listen to "Howl Yes ASU" and prepare to swing wide the doors of perception.